I am very, very good at one particular transgression.
It just so happens that I am finding it may be the goal of ALL sin.

I am what you call an introvert–extrovert. You may know what this means, but I didn't until I took one of those prophetic personality tests people take while studying interpersonal communication in college. Here's what I learned (that I already kind of knew):
1. I am very comfortable and confident around and in front of people, but I am depleting the tank the whole time.
2. I "recharge" by being alone.

You might be like me. I love being in the mix. I love being able to communicate with others. I love one-on-one discussions. But, over the course of a full day, I find myself drained because of it. I will then often find myself loving traffic jams because I get spend some time by myself. I don't answer the phone (because it's illegal, officer) and I don't have to worry about engaging or even speaking. My voice is almost girlie sometimes, so it's nice to not have to hear it for an hour.

So, when I am at my lowest, I default to isolation. When I struggle, when I am hurting, when I am in pain, I retreat (but not in the Nouwen-kind-of-God-time). At the very moment that I need the Spirit and the Church the most, I inflate a God-given inclination of mine into a weapon. God wired me to Sabbath. I get a lot out of it. God created me to desire time alone. When I am in balance, this is healthy—in fact, I would say it's disobedience for me not to take time "for myself".
But just like hunger turns into gluttony and discipline turns into control, my Sabbath turns into seclusion. I become cold, unavailable. At the moment that God would want to heal me and use His children to heal me. I hide. I am very, very good at hiding.

I am being humbled in the wake of last week's message on sin. God created humanity to need community, to need each other. When, in rebellion, we pulled away from our only lifeline, we also invited isolation into history. Adam hated being alone! Eve was graciously created because Adam needed her. He needed her. When sin blemished everything, one of the first treasures to be lost was perfect community.
One of the core values of Ecclesia is "Life Together". We say it this way: "We believe that God transforms us when we move out of isolation into honest, vulnerable relationships with each other." It's true. It's really true. I am being challenged this week to allow God to "heimlich" the sin of separation out of my body. Otherwise, I'll be choking on this bad apple for the rest of my life—losing air every time.

For His Kingdom,
JKB